Welcome to Rick Russell, who became Chair of Sonoma Subud  in January 2014.  Read Rick’s update on Sonoma. 

My story overlaps Jerry’s completely, I was involved in the same Gurdjieff group, first as a student while Anne was teaching formal classes, and then as a loyal devotee when she stopped teaching classes and built the intentional community Jerry refers to. I stayed very close to her; my family and I lived with her a couple times, including right at the end, before she kicked me out of her house.  The entire association, which was basically a student-teacher relationship, even after the classes stopped, spanned 30 plus years.  I had no impression of what Subud was other than what Anne said regarding Bennett’s interest in it and her being what she referred to as a “doorway”, I believe, in Bennett’s group.

Last year Jerry and Ed said that they had joined Subud and that it was a hoot.  I, knowing only that and that it was experiential, a personal experience rather than a set of beliefs or group enterprise, phoned Muchtar and I read three books on Subud, Bennett’s, Bright-Paul’s, and a third one called, I believe, The History of Subud, Volume 1. The thread that ran through the books, to me, was the description of being physically, literally, moved about a room by a force outside of one’s self, or something in the highest part of one’s self, that is, one’s “real self”, which is sort of outside of one, in that it is not the usual active force or “self” or whatever – the term “whatever” indicating that although I’m interested in the structure of the universe and the person and the soul and all, I saw Subud as a welcome relief from all that, with the thread being a force that entered and moved, literally physically moved, hundreds and hundreds of people all over the world, regardless of what they were thinking or hoping for or believing about the shape of the universe. It wasn’t them “doing” something, there were no tasks to complete. A person was opened and God the Creator then had room to enter – the “had room to enter” implies, of course, that I do see a structure of the person, with “room” or “lack of room” for God. I evidently can’t escape myself.

I finished the books and I started meeting with Muchtar.  I found him to be as kind and humane and sincere as anyone I’ve ever met. He was very game in my catechism classes, carrying on heroically in the face of a student who had no questions, who merely smiled and said, “Sounds great.”  Despite my fairly passive performance at catechism, Muchtar, who was probably worn down by the effort, set the date and I was opened.  At the opening I stood still, waiting, which was the verb used in at least a couple of the books as the only “action” during Latihan. I stood and waited. Toward the end of the Latihan my lower legs began to feel warm, as if the blood were sinking down into them.  I’m 65.  I wasn’t sure that I was being moved but I sank to my knees and then sank to the prayer position of Islam and stayed there until the end of the Latihan.  I wasn’t sure if I had received but I was thrilled that something had happened. Ah, the need for accomplishment.  And I was glad that what had happened was visible.  Ah, vanity.

In subsequent Latihans I have had some of the same feelings in my lower legs if I remain standing still but not if I move about, and I do move about, thinking that if God can find me when I stand still I’m sure that he can find me if I move around and it might loosen me up a little. You know, to “make room”. Sometimes I just want to help the process.  Alas, God evidently feels fine about me both standing still and moving around and has not moved me in the way he moved so many in the books.  I’m okay with that, I’m not here to criticize God, or my Higher Self. Or anyone else.  Even without being so moved, I go to Latihan eagerly and leave glad that I went, other than the gnawing sense that I’m not really getting what I’m going there to get.

The genesis for my involvement in Subud is directly the fault of one Mr. Sanderson. In the 1970’s he and I and about a hundred other people were engaged in a work group centered on the teachings of Gurdjieff. The leader of this group had been a young student of John Godolfin Bennett in England in the late 50’s early 60’s. She purported to have been a Subud helper although she only opened a handful of people who were instructed not to share this information with anyone else. The latihan was not practiced but at least one person, Rick Russell, was advised to explore Subud. This Gurdjieff group operated for approximately thirty years and in many ways was an intentional community similar to Skymont. It shared a similar fate although many of the details were substantially different. I left after fifteen years in crisis and explored other teachings and practices. In 2011(?), after about thirty years of separation, Sanderson and I met at the wedding of a mutual friend. I queried him about his experience in Subud. He was open and thorough in his responses. He encouraged me to read some of the literature. As a student of Gurdjieff, I was particularly interested in Bennett’s accounts in Concerning Subud and Towards the True Self. Ed Ristad read these books at the same time. Both Ed and I were motivated to be opened and to practice the latihan. Sanderson gave us Muchtar Salesman’s contact information and we met with him for a probationary period. Muchtar was skillful in introducing us to Subud and demonstrated by his demeanor a quality of being I found attractive.

What I appreciate about Subud is its emphasis on the individual’s connection to “Almighty God” although I prefer to characterize this connection as conscience. When I was opened, I did not experience anything detectable but I enjoyed the practice. I found it light-hearted and fun. I found myself looking forward to each latihan. For about six months I was unable to detect anything definitive during latihan. Then I began to have regular, extended experiences of grace during latihan and throughout my day. Although I am not a member of any religious organization, I found myself experiencing the reality of the 23^rd Psalm and the Lord’s Prayer during the events of my ordinary daily life. This experience faded after about three months, but its imprint has been lasting and informs my current latihan practice. I am most grateful to Sanderson, Muchtar, Bapak and the thousands of people who have made it possible for me to be opened and to participate in a form of worship that I can intellectually accept. I hope to practice the latihan for the rest of my life.

I’m Rick Russell, a new Subud member (since June) and have been asked to be the new chairperson for Subud Sonoma. It is a real honor to be able to serve in this capacity, and I’m looking forward to getting to know you. A bit about me: I’m 68, married with 4 grown daughters and 4 grandchildren, and have lived and worked in Sonoma County since 1971, as a carpenter and contractor, then architect and school construction inspector. As board president at the Lomi Psychiatric Clinic in Santa Rosa, I gained some familiarity with how non-profits work. I was in a Gurdjieff group for some 22 years, but was feeling unable to progress further with my inner life. Subud has changed this, and I am very grateful. One of the big things I have received in latihan is a sense of the lightness and good humor that it is possible to have in one’s life, and it is this that I wish to guide me as chairperson. If I start getting heavy, I’ll know I’m on the wrong track.

We had a general meeting at the Subud hall on Saturday Jan. 25, at which I was selected as chair.  Tutut Sass, also new, has volunteered for Communications. Michael Myers will continue as Treasurer. Members were asked what they most wanted to see happen in the near future, and these were the requests: 1) overwhelmingly, a new carpet! 2) more social gatherings; 3) a charitable outlet for our members, both to help Subud members who need it, and also to help the community at large. And of course, 4) shorter meetings!

We committee members met on Feb. 1, and approved a real estate agent to help us with obtaining a permanent lessee for the hall when we are not using it. We are also brainstorming fundraising possibilities to help us achieve our goals in the coming year, possibly including a Bingo night or an online auction. If you have any suggestions, please contact me or another committee member by mail or email.

One of our most important sources of income is donations from our members. This is your organization, and exists to make the latihan available to you, and to help others. We have grown a lot recently (6 new men, 2 women!), and are hopeful that we can serve everyone’s needs more fully. I’m enclosing a pledge form, and hope you will consider making a commitment to a monthly donation. We really could use a new carpet! If you set up an automatic bill pay, that would help us even more by providing a more reliable budget. Please let us know your priorities, and feel free to call me if you have any questions.

Yours in appreciation,

Rick Russell, Chairperson (rick-russell [at] sbcglobal.net) Ph. 707- 529-5513